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Does Ashton Kutcher Have a Mommy Complex?

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Any opportunity I have to bad-mouth Ashton Kutcher, I’m simply not passing up. The level of douchebaggery that he gives off just offends my senses. Plus, anyone who f*cks up Demi Moore like that is just downright evil.

So in light Ashy stepping out with this Lorene Scafaria chick for the second or third time in the last month or so, I think it’s safe to assume (1) they are totally dating and (2) Ashton clearly has a mommy complex. What else could explain why his affinity for cougars older women? He doesn’t need their money and as much as it pains me to admit it, it’s not like he couldn’t bag a younger, hotter chick.

Something you’re trying to tell us Ashton? It’s okay, let it out.